It’s interesting. When people find out that I am in a same-sex relationship, I get a lot of questions. Either that, or a blank look. And every once in awhile, people don’t miss a beat when they move on with the conversation. Most of the time though, there is an air of surprise. I can’t exactly blame them- it surprised the hell out of me, too.
But the most awkward conversations I tend to have with people about my relationship usually don’t have a whole lot to do with just me. Instead, it’s the conversations that veer towards politics and gay rights and the upcoming election.
When Maryland legalized gay marriage earlier this year, I had a co-worker ask me if she should contact a friend she hadn’t been in contact with in awhile, who lives in Maryland , to congratulate her on the new ability to legally be tied to her partner. She asked if that was something that her friend would like, or if it was tacky. She asked if this was something that warranted a quick call or a greeting card. Honestly, it took me by complete surprise.
My new lesbian status has seemed to suddenly made me a pseudo-expert on gay rights.
This makes me incredibly uncomfortable, in so many ways. For one, I have never been one to talk politics. They have suddenly shifted importance, becoming something that affects me in a more direct way than I ever thought possible- but I still don’t like them. I hate the fact that I have to argue why I deserve the same basic rights as everyone else just because of the person I am in love with. I hate that my right to marry is directly affected by the man who is voted into office later this year.
I hate the baggage and the hardships that come along with living my life the way I want to live it.
I’m not a revolutionary. I’m not much of a fighter. I lack the passion that my beautiful girlfriend has for our rights. I lack her spirit.
I’m just a girl who is in love with another girl.
And maybe someday, we will live in a world where that is enough for me to stand up in front of my friends and family, in any state I want, and say “I do.”